Verses:
Never have I felt so beautiful with you, never
With you I feel so right, so pure in your sight
Never have I felt so wonderful with you, never
With you I feel so nice, so lovely and so nice
With you I feel so good…
Never have I felt so in love with you, never
With you, you are a mystery with a silent energy
Never have I felt this oblivious sensation, never
Would someone grab a hold of me, I think it’s taking over me
With you I am complete…
(Chorus)
In the darkened night I can feel you all around me
I can see the light, the light in your eyes, it gleams
And it takes me places where no one has ever been…
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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I agree this should be in the "Lyrics" forum. Check out the rules for the "Lyrics Poetry" forum. They specifically said NOT to put songs here.
On another note (ha ha), these were very good lyrics. They sound like they would make a wonderful song. Lyrics are hard to critique because you can't actually hear the tune, so you can't say much about the rhythm or anything. I like it, though. Keep it up.
-*-*--Diana--*-*-
I think you ment this to be in the "Lyrics" forum, not "Lyric Poetry". Maybe a mod can move this?
I've never really critqued Lyrics before but just one thing:
[qoute]With you I feel so nice, so lovely and so nice[/qoute]
I was trying to sing the song in my head and the two "Nice"'s right next to eachother didn't seem good to me. But I liked it, nice job!
This is a song I wrote, in a time that I was feeling so deep in love...in the darkness of my heart. The music is great...